Sooooooo......one evening, my LA road dawg Dan Belle, and I, we decided to indulge in a night out. There are treats in those streets, so we gussied up and got on the good foot. We began at one of our fave spots for gluttony, El Cholo. Here, we met up with some former colleagues. Good times ensued and the Rita's were flowing, and the chips and salsa was delicious, and......well you get the point, we were grubbin'! Anywaaaaayyy, amongst the other folks was a young lady that Dan Belle and I did not know. She was a friend of our friends,friend. Dig me?After a bit of open ended conversation, and more drank, she began to warm up to all, subsequently "fitting in" with the flow. Now Dan Belle and I have great stories and some are appropriate for sharing, and some we embellish, and some we definitely keep under lock and key. Needless to say that the table was full of laughter, and nostalgia filled the air. Our former life tends to be very intriguing to strangers (no we were not involved in any felonious activity or anything that would shame our mamas). Wellllll, dinner came and went and D and I decided that it was time to hat up and move on to the next spot. We said our good-byes, but in the process, we got the feeling that this random broad wanted to roll (must have been the stories). What the heck, I thought, she's a cute girl, she might come in handy at the bar. Besides, the more the merrier. Guys like it when we travel in packs. Soooooo, she ditched the dude she came to meet, and bounced with D and I. She even rode in the car with us (this should have been our first clue).Our next stop was to meet some old friends. So we arrive at Spot No. 2, introductions are made, and everyone seems to be having a great time. Suddenly, my boys are asking D and I about homegirl. The questions range from, "what does she do?", to "how long have you all been friends"? Quietly and strangely, we both had to answer that we didn't really know broad, and she was with us at the previous spot with a previous cat, and she wanted to roll, so we said "sure!" That is when she went from her government name, to "Just Met You", and for the rest of the evening, she lived up to it, famously. She set her sights on one of my boys, and the side show began. Now, I must hand it to her, she wasn't a punk. She saw something she liked and she committed to the game, in spite of the fact that she knew NOT ONE of us a few hours before. We had a round of drinks, and decided to head somewhere else.Our next, and ultimately final stop, was a club. We chose this particular spot, because as we were driving down the street, "Just Met You" said "STOP", "I know the bouncers here, let me see what's up", so the caravan pulled over, and D and I watched as "Just Met You" worked her mojo. Next thing I know, she signals for us to valet and we are walking in. I think to myself, "okay, 'Just Met You', I see ya"! Please bear in mind that The Maven is no longer a club banger. Once upon a time, I would shut a damn club DOWN, but I am a cougar in training now, so I'll leave that loud music and jumping around to the kittens. Side note: Anyone who saw me in action at Lady M's wedding should ignore that last statement.Continuing on......we all converge on the bar and get a lil something, and stand around to soak in the vibe. The vibe was actually very cool. The music was on point, so much so, I got the DJ's card for future reference. We are all having fun, seeing old faces, and meeting new ones. "Just Met You" is still smelling my boy, but also making her rounds in the club. Obviously, she is seasoned. D and I catch a glimpse of her canoodling off to the side with someone familiar, or NOT. With this chick, who knows? HaHA!Finally, the night comes to an end, mainly because LA is corny like that and shuts down early, akin to when your elders came in your room and shut the lights off, regardless of what you were doing, and told you to take that arse to bed.The crowd filled the streets and as we waited for the cars, everyone said their good-byes, good nights, and good-to-see ya's. The ride finally came and D and I jumped in, but "Just Met You' was off closing her deals. She finally got in the back seat, and we made a bee line to her car for the drop off. At some point, D and I realized that she was backseat mackin' on her phone to one of our boys, and we gave each other the side eye. Broad works fast. No hate.So, we got her to her ride, shared a few empty thoughts, and she was gone. Just like that, "Just Met You" came and went. She had a great night, had great food, great conversation, met some great guys, and all this with two broads she didn't know from Eve. Go figure.The moral of this story is, you can take a horse to the water, but don't be mad if she's thirsty and drinks it all!Holla!
-The Maven
http://thegameneedsher.blogspot.com/
So as I see the tinted out Mav-mobile approach I hit the running boards and dip down low with my Cadillac gangster lean perfected by those many late night creeps in the Chi-city streets at 3AM. It's not that I don't want to be seen but you know a brother gots to keep his cover on low and his mack on tilt. After all, you never know what the future holds in these days and times. Thangs ain't as easy as they used to be so when your spidy sense starts tinglining you gots to pay attention- smell me?
ReplyDeleteBut anyway back to the mission at hand...The sexy Mav-mobile comes gliding by and out pops this cute little honey with the been around the block attitude that THE MAVEN introduced to me earlier that night. How do you say thanks in Ciroc? Anyway, she ever so slightly gives the nod in my direction as if to say; "I see you player!" Well, me not to be outdone, hit the IPOD's "hit list" selection and let the Marvin roll. (You know, a mood is only as good as the music that sets it.)
I try not to pump it too loud cause I know my CHI-girl in LA homie has that grandma hearing when Marvin is crooning. I don't want to be part II of her and Dan Belle's embellished stories at the next bar joint.
Honey plays it extremly well and rolls to her previously parked wheels and gives The Mav-mobile the hi sign and they roll out. She pops the trunk and grabs her gym bag and purse. I'm feeling mommy already! I creep up along side her as if I was in prey mode. A LION knows when there's meat on the plain.
She flips back the silky stuff and shoots her hip in my direction and says; "Soooooo, what's the deal good looking? You up for a little late night cap or what?"
Now me being from the streets game recognized game and knew the time without looking at my Gucci. I said what you think, baby girl? With a "Huh" she flips in and tosses the bags in the back.
Now I know mommy is a cutie and she obviously is feeling me but as MAVEN told you, LA shuts down early so there's only one place to flex to. I said, the hotel, yes the hotel, the HOliday INN....well you know the rest if you're from the 80's. So with that mutual vibe in the air, Marvin takes us all the way there but not before we make a quick pit stop at the liquor store for some "tini ingredients" (It's gonna be a long night and I'm up for the challenge." I ain't no PUNK either, Maven. Yah know?
After ringin up the essentials, and gettting into a short debate with the Middle Eastern dude about why Bush is an asshole, I get some Altoid gum and bounce. Heading North I see the familiar Green and yellow script for the Inn and the blood begins to flow.
I take a quick side bar look and notice that honey has dipped into a sandman trance. I'm trippin cause I know this is a nightmare, right? Sleep faster than you can say "What the F...?" My mood is blown and so is my wallet at this point. Damn you, Maven and your "Just met you, chicks"
The moral of THIS story is never judge a book by it's pretty cover unless you read the forward, first.
-Peace
CHI-TOWN RED
THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!!
ReplyDeleteIf you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about
how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning ... uphill BOTH ways....yadda, yadda, yadda
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell
I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and
how easy they've got it! But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't
help but look around and notice the youth of today.
You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet . If we wanted to know something,
we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter ..with a pen!
Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it
would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike
to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day
to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody
else called they got a busy signal, that's it!
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no
idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug
dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels
or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the
seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you
and you couldn't see, you were just screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no on screen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide
to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to
get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no
Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you
hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire ... imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!
Regards,
The over 30 Crowd